


Things Aren't Always What They Seem

by jaded_jane



Series: Things Aren't Always What They Seem [1]
Category: Big Time Rush (Band)
Genre: Gen, douchebag!Logan, jealous!James, sort of humorous?
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2012-05-30
Updated: 2012-05-30
Packaged: 2017-11-08 00:01:47
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 1,911
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/436880
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/jaded_jane/pseuds/jaded_jane
Summary: <blockquote class="userstuff">
              <p>James is on a mission to locate Logan's tattoo. What he finds, he considers much, much worse.</p>
            </blockquote>





	Things Aren't Always What They Seem

Usually the alert results were articles written about the band or the show. Occasionally, fictional stories about them or their alter egos would appear, as James was a bit paranoid (he would say cautious) and entered the characters’ names into the alert list too. Rarely, and therefore surprisingly, photos of them would be shown.

Even in those seldom moments, the pictures were mostly of himself or Carlos due to their habit of tweeting pictures.

Nothing could have prepared James for what he saw.

James stared intensely at the screen. Thinking that he was imagining things, he rubbed his eyes really hard with his fists and glanced back at the phone in front of him.

Much to James’ dismay, the pictures were still there. Pictures of Kendall and Logan. **At the beach. Surfing. Running. Enjoying the sunshine.**

Snatching the phone back up, James quickly exited the email application and dialed a number he knew so well. As he brought the phone to his ear, James heard the call connect to the other party. “How could you?” he thundered. _So much for staying calm_ , he thought.

“James. Buddy. How are you this wonderful day?”

James ground his teeth together before he responded. “Don’t fuck with me, Schmidt. That cute little piglet will be part of tomorrow’s breakfast burrito and your brother will be heartbroken if you don’t answer me now. How could you?!”

Kendall sighed. “I was hoping that I was hallucinating about the paparazzi. I guess I was wrong.” He paused. “What exactly have you seen?”

That question made James’ heart lurch and his voice become deadly quiet. “What are you not telling me?”

The silence on the other end of the line did not comfort James in the slightest. He started pacing back and forth waiting for Kendall to find his balls and **answer the damn question**. It took a good minute, but eventually Kendall began to speak again. “When we were at the beach, Logan started asking me questions about my latest tattoo. Y’know, if it hurt to be done, how long it took, etc. He also asked where I got it-“

A knock upon the front door interrupted James’ concentration on what Kendall was saying. As James walked towards the sound, he tuned back in to hear Kendall proudly proclaim, “So, I brought him there. You should have seen his face! He had one done while we waited. It looks so cool.”

A quick look through the peephole showed the cause of James’ misery to be standing on the other side of the door. James wrenched the door open and grabbed Logan by the front of his shirt, one handed, dragging him inside.

James could vaguely hear Kendall still going on and on about his and Logan’s little adventure when he barked out, “Got it,” and hung up on Kendall, who was probably mid-word, not that James cared.

James threw his phone in the direction of the couch, closed the door and eyed the boy whose shirt was still firmly within his grasp. Logan had the gall to appear amused by James’ frazzled state.

“Rough morning?” Logan made no move to free himself from James. He knew from experience that if extricated, James would just chase him down and the scenario would repeat until James deemed it over.

There was a reason the band’s motto was “Let James be James”.

“Where is it?”

Logan’s new expression of confusion did not help his cause either. “Where’s what?”

“You know.”

“No, _I_ don’t.”

“Yes, _you_ do.”

At Logan’s next denial of knowing what James was referring to, James figured that the only way to find out where it was, was to look for it himself. He grabbed Logan’s t-shirt with both hands and tugged upward.

Logan sputtered a little in disbelief but allowed James to yank the shirt off his body. It wasn’t until Logan felt hands pulling on his belt that he actively started fighting back. All he really managed to accomplish was getting himself backed against the nearest wall.

By the time he got James to move away enough so that there was actual space between the two of them, Logan’s pants were around his ankles and his boxer briefs were hanging a bit low on his hips. “Were you looking for my dick, dude? ‘Cause if so, my shirt didn’t need to come off for that.”

James stepped back into Logan’s personal bubble and quickly pushed the underwear down so that it joined the pants at Logan’s feet. A quick head to toe sweep of Logan’s body didn’t produce what James wanted to see.

As Logan attempted to hastily redress himself, James spun him around so Logan was now facing the wall. James’ eyes searched every inch of skin available to them and still didn’t find what they were looking for.

Logan lost his hold on his clothes when James pushed him into a sitting position on the floor.

James lowered himself to the floor as well and reached for Logan’s shoes. Once he removed them and the socks from Logan’s feet and came up empty once more, James peered up at Logan’s face and said rather wearily, “Where is it?”

Logan, who had given up on everything and laid down waiting for the madness to be over (or the fun to truly start, he couldn’t decide), lifted his head and replied equally as tiredly, “Where’s _what_?”

“Your tattoo.”

Logan let his head fall back to the floor. “I don’t have a tattoo. Or any piercings as you can plainly see. I like having a clean body. Where would you even get the idea I got a tattoo?”

James moved himself so he could see Logan’s face. “Kendall.”

Logan rolled his eyes. “Kendall said I got a tattoo?”

James scrunched up his face as he tried to recall what Kendall had babbled about. All he could remember was his reaction to the pictures in the Google alert, calling Kendall and Kendall saying…. “Well, he didn’t come out and say, ‘Logan got a tattoo,’ if that’s what you’re asking.”

“Then, how…. And why?”

“I called Kendall to express my displeasure that you two went to the beach without me. I didn’t even get to tell him that because he was too busy saying that you were asking all sorts of questions about his tattoos, like if they hurt, how long they took. Things like that.”

Logan turned his head to look at James. “It was just small talk.” He smirked. “Displeasure, huh?”

James ignored the second part in favor of remaining on task. “But he also said that you asked where he got them done and he brought you there! That you had it done while you waited!”

It was Logan’s turn to convey recollection through facial expression. “The only place we went after the beach was to this fancy stationery store. I bought a notebook for songwriting and had a design emblazoned on the cover. I never asked where he had his tattoos done. I did ask where he got…. Oh.” Logan started to chuckle.

James couldn’t bring himself to do more than kick out at Logan in an attempt to stop the other boy’s laughter. “Oh, what?”

“I asked where he got the inspiration for the heartbreak tattoo and why he had it done. He gave me some long-winded bs explanation on how he wanted to be reminded to not take the good times for granted.” A few more laughs escaped Logan before he added, “I think he not-so-secretly has a boner for John Mayer.”

James was well aware of Kendall’s love for the singer/songwriter. Not only had he been serenaded on multiple occasions with “Edge of Desire” by the blond, randomly accompanied at times by the boy at his side, but Kendall also carried a copy of the _Battle Studies_ album with him everywhere. The similarities between the album’s heartbreak logo and Kendall’s tattoo were noticeable.

“So you bought a notebook, not got inked, right?” James wanted to make sure there was no room for error this time.

“James, the only thing that got inked was the notebook. We started writing-“ Logan cut himself off and groaned. He was in the process of covering his face when James crawled up and got in it.

“ _You_ and Kendall were writing, **together**?!” James felt like he had been punched, repeatedly, in the gonads. That’s how much this hurt. “Is _nothing_ sacred anymore? First the beach with the running and the surfing; and now the writing. Please tell me that it wasn’t a screenplay or a script.”

Logan stayed mum, thereby confirming James’ fears.

“Logan! That was _our_ thing. The thing that _we_ do to take a break from the band and the show. Next you’re going to tell me I’m not really your best friend.”

The silence was deafening.

James managed to pry Logan’s arms off of his face and found the bastard to be smirking _again_. He wanted nothing more than to smack that smug grin right off Logan.

Logan’s ability to be an asshole knew no limits, but even he knew when to be genuine. “Of course, you’re my best friend. Would it help if I told you that I was thinking of you the entire time I was with him? Thinking how much better you are at it, how good you make me feel when we do it?”

Too bad the sincerity never lasted long.

James settled back on the floor. “Douchebag. Why’d you come over in the first place?”

“Kendall wanted me to do damage control. He knows I enjoy death-defying situations.”

James stared at the ceiling. “That you do.” Unsure of what to say next, James opted for the forward approach. “Sorry I undressed you.”

“Not as sorry as I was when I realized I wasn’t going to get laid.”

James snickered. “Yeah, well….”

“Yeah, well what?”

James hoisted himself off the living room floor and walked towards the kitchen. As he reached the threshold, he called out to Logan, “Well, dress yourself and leave. Consider damage control done.” He turned back towards Logan to include “I’ll see your ass tomorrow.”

Logan righted his clothing, reshod himself and moved to the front door. He was in the process of stepping through the doorway when Logan decided that he wanted the last word. “I’ll make sure you do!”  


* * *

  
When he arrived on set the next morning, James felt good.

“James, where have you been? You’re late.” Ah, James had missed Carlos’ mothering.

“Sorry, _mom_. Had to run some errands, then I stopped for breakfast. Here, I brought you a burrito.” James handed Carlos the item as Kendall walked up to them.

Before Kendall could say anything to James, his phone rang. Kendall accepted the call without checking caller id and brought the phone to his ear.

James turned his attention back to Carlos who was raving about his newly acquired breakfast. “James, this is delicious! How come it tastes so good?”

James leaned in closer to Carlos and stage-whispered, “The secret is extra fresh bacon.”

Kendall’s eyes widened; whether it was from James’ statement or his phone call, James was unsure. He greatly hoped it was both.

“James! Come here, dude. I have to show you something.”

James swung his head around to see Logan standing by his dressing room. He nodded and spun back to Carlos. “Logan’s going to show me the phases of his moon. Enjoy the rest of your breakfast.” 


End file.
